I've had so many people gasp and tell me I'm brave when they heard I moved to England alone. People of all ages seem shocked that I've spent so much time travelling by myself, but I really don't feel courageous or out of the ordinary. Just ask my family and they'll tell you I'm usually a wimp who loves the comforts of a cozy home. It certainly wasn't my dream to travel solo. Seeing the world alone isn't as scary as most people seem to think... or maybe God has just blinded me to the things that should have terrified me.
Many people who follow this blog have never met me or have just had brief chats with me and they assume I must be one of those wander-lust world-travellers. I've actually never had those feet that itch to see the world. I didn't spend years dreaming about doing this trip; the thought of living abroad occurred to me in January 2008 and I arrived in England ten months later. This trip was born out of a desire to experience life in another country, step outside my comfort zone, learn to trust God to daily provide for me, and dare to fulfill dreams alone. Travelling was a perk that came with the territory.
It really disappoints me to discover that most women I've spoken with about this trip have told me they would never consider travelling alone. It's not something I would suggest for every woman, but I think more people should consider it. Through solo travel you have to solve problems and be your own advocate. No group tour, no friend to giggle with, no husband to order food for you in a foreign language, no backups. It's just you alone with your thoughts, hopes, dreams, and fears. Writing that makes me laugh and realize why people think I'm crazy. If somebody had the option to travel with friends, why on earth would they travel alone? In the midst of the loneliness, moments of panic, and abundance of joy, I've learned things about God and myself that I would never see if I had the comforts of having people around to support me. I love travelling with other people because it's a great way to see the world, but I don't want to hold back on adventure simply because solo travel offers unique challenges.
I think once in a while we all need to find a way to break down our comfort zone and see what doors open unexpectedly as a result. I'm talking to myself as much as anyone else – I love my comfort zone and it's never easy to push beyond it. A few months ago I received an email from a friend who stepped out of her comfort zone by joining a yoga class alone and I was so excited for her. I think there are little things we can do to spread our wings and find joy in the little things but we get too comfortable with the familiar. Try a new recipe. Venture out to a "new members" night at a photography or gardening club. Walk in a park you've driven past a hundred times, but never bothered stopping. Buy a milk-shake and sit on a bench to people-watch. Drive to the beach alone and watch a sunset.
Live from the heart! Keep watching for a breathtaking piece of folly, no matter how small, that God places in front of you to delight your heart and make other people shake their heads at you.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
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2 comments:
It takes a woman who is comfortable enough in her own skin with a good desire for adventure to travel at all, let alone. Who are we kidding? we're always outside of our comfort zone when we travel! but that's what so awesome about it! It's so weird...I can't shake this sad feeling I have that your travels are done! I don't generally "live" through other people, so i don't know why, but I guess it's just because I miss it. traveling that is. It's time for another trip for Russ & I. We've started planning. Still don't know where, but it's gonna happen sooner than later.
by the way - my most recent out-of-my-comfort-zone thing that I did of choice was join a belly dancing class last fall by myself. it was Fun!! I should do it again... :)
I think that people who are comfortable in their own skin and are ok with solitude, have healthier relationships with other people. They can think for themselves, are less "needy", and instead have the freedom and confidence to enter into relationships with a generous and honest spirit. In a strange way, being comfortable with yourself actually makes you less self centred. Your energy can go into thinking of others instead of yourself. It's late, I'm rambling, hope some of that made at least some sense.
Welcome home, Amanda! At least that made sense.
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